Sunday, November 30, 2008
Saturday, November 29, 2008
I wish I were in California, or somewhere warm. I wish I were outside, on a beach or in a forest. I wish I could feel alive again, among other's who carried me high and all longed to live and breathe for good and not "just because." I want to do more with my life, better things, and I wake up so many days feeling that I'm wasting my days putting half of my effort into school and slowly letting myself fall behind.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Today, sitting with my family of close to thirty people, I did a lot of thinking about my life. I thought about the direction I really want to take my life, and listened as I heard stories from my aunts and uncles about when they were young, and heard my other cousins talk about their dreams, loves, and failures I wish I could spend more time with them, they really mean a lot to me.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
I'm not too sure what to write about today; there was a terrorist attack in India and 78 people have been killed. Apparently the gunman were targeting Americans--go figure.
I don't want to talk politics on this blog whatsoever, but I feel like I as well as most other Americans are becoming so numb to all the murdering going on overseas. It's funny how the only way I found out about this terrorist attack was because I was checking out CNN's website.
I became numb and entered a mini-depression last year when I learned about Darfur. It's not my disappointment with our country that depresses me, we clearly can't help everyone. What makes me sad is how people can kill one another, and how others can allow it happen. By others, I don't just mean the U.S. However, I don't think most people in our country value life the way people in the East do; we have never been refugees, experienced genocide first hand, and for the most part, never experienced starvation. Yes, some people are hungry in our country, but it's not often you see an entire society who cannot find or afford to feed their children.
I don't like to talk about genocides and other terrors going on overseas. In my multicultural education class at Springfield College, a class that was created for teachers to learn to teach all students equally, we spent a great deal learning about bullying.
That's why I don't talk too much about genocides and terrors; what have I done to stop them? Nothing.
If you're teaching a class and you hear a student mutter a name under his breath, or push another student in such a way that it would be easy to overlook it, and you do overlook it, you are just as much responsible for the bullying as the bully is. The term referred to is inaction. If you watch a kid get beat up on the playground and you don't help him, you're as much at fault as anyone else.
At one point I helped raise money and awareness for Darfur. I donated money to the website. I volunteered almost nightly at a local Springfield food pantry, and for the first tie in my life, I felt like I was making a difference.
Now I don't do anything. This is partly because I'm busy with my new school, writing, pledging for a fraternity, and other selfish things. Sometimes because of this I feel like I'm losing myself. Becoming "numb" to things comes hand in hand with a loss of care, kindness, and compassion. I never want to fully lose that.
I started off with not much to say today, but I actually ended up writing a few words, huh? Everyone have a happy Thanksgiving, and as lame as it sounds, try and think about how thankful we really should be for the food on our table. Oh, and have some fun :D
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
"If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I'm about to do today?"-Steven Jobs.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
It only seems right that the first post in my blog be an introduction of a sort. I should tell you what I plan to blog about, a little abut me, and why I even have a blog; why I'm "blogworthy."
The purpose of this blog is to serve as an outlet for me. It is written in direct parallel to my website (www.thewritingofrob.com) in which I'd like to give great thanks to the designer of it Dave Estes, an amazing artist and my best friend from my hometown of Wallingford, CT. You can check out his website at www.dave-estes.com.
I need an outlet because, as we all know, life's not always good. I'm not a nihilist, yet I tend to write some depressing stuff. On this blog, I'll try just to write, good and bad, weird and strange, truth and lies. I will not, and I repeat, WILL NOT, report on my life, crying to you about whatever seems to be going bad for me at that particular point in time. This is not my journal; I hide that under my bed and write in it when I can transpose my emotions into a story or idea... or when I don't want to cry to a publicly read blog.
Plus the idea of writing whatever I want to be read by whoever wants to read it sounds pretty cool to me.
You can't categorize me just as you can't rally categorize my writing. Some people see me as intelligent; others see me as dumb, wacky, and crazy. Some see me as a writer, others as a student, and others as a personal trainer. Some look up to me while others hate me. Some days I dress nice, others I dress in my athletic-wear. I love animals, sci-fi, sports, poetry, my family, exercise, and all forms of art. What I want to be when I grow up is someone who makes a difference.
I believe that actions DO speak louder than words, and I am NEVER all talk. I agree that ignoring something that is wrong is just as bad as partaking in it, and I support anyone who stands up for what they believe in.
I also support passion. I support anyone who is passionate about anything: overcoming a fear, beating a record, athletics, graduating or doing well on a project. Passion is always accompanied by love, willpower, care, and compassion. Those are the traits that I look for in people that I choose to surround myself. They are the most important to me.
I can't half-ass anything. This gets me in trouble a lot because I'm an extremist; I love fitness so I become a personal trainer and aspire to be a bodybuilder; I volunteer at an animal shelter so I sneak home a bunny even though my moms allergic and my dad threatens to throw me out of the house; and I love to write so I create a blog and a website.
I'm busy with school right now. Most of the time I'm behind because I'm a procrastinator, I love to dream (and sleep), and I ALWAYS take on almost more than I can handle. I write when I can, and am working on trying to write a page a night. Here in this blog I'll keep you updated on my current projects.
Thanks for reading and I hope you'll revisit time after time and check out what I'm up to. If you don't, I can't be mad about it, because I probably don't know you. If I do know you and you decide not to visit my blog anymore, don't tell me because I'm really sensitive. I'll write a poem about it, or cry myself to sleep.
Until next time...